Fantasist's Scroll

Here’s a little bit I did with fish.
The classic beginning image for 3d artists is something underwater, with fish. Usually, with dolphins, but I managed to refrain from that bit. Still, this is a look at shore from the underside of a mythical tropic paradise. A “fish eye’s view”, if you will. I hope it’s different enough to warrant its inclusion here.
Well, anyway, it’s art. Of a sort.

Yes, seeking inspiration from SPAM.
The other day, I got a junk e-mail with some interesting words in it. And, an interesting, obviously random, title. That’s when it hit me: Use that “junk” as a writing exercise. Too goofy for words, right? Well, try it. Write something with the subject as the title and include all the sentences, and fragments, in the junk e-mail as found. Fragments may be worked into full sentences. Feel up to it? Try this one:

My study of unguent
but it was like the marriage of a reduced old noble to a plebeian eyes, when I formed the resolution of being godmother to your
natural in one who was making entirely new arrangements in life. humbly to me and begs for my forgiveness. This is my right. This
calling an Italian-iron, a bedstead. But we cant expect a
no danger of putting any strained construction on your motives.
I wish you would, said Mrs. Steerforth, with a smile. But, save her from this disgrace, and she shall never be disgraced

That’s a real e-mail I got, by the way. Oh, and this only works with non-sexually oriented material, unless, of course you’re writing a letter to a pornographic magazine.

This is National Novel Writing Month.
Or, if you’re one of the cool kids, NaNoWriMo. The idea, in a nutshell, is to write a book in thirty days or less. Or finish that monster that you’ve always meant to get around to again. Either way, the goal is a completed novel by the end of the month. Frankly, it seems impossible to me, but the guy who puts this on every year is also the author of No Plot? No Problem!: A Low-Stress, High-Velocity Guide to Writing a Novel in 30 Days, so, maybe, just maybe it’s possible to accomlish.
Well, I won’t find out this year because I’m just in the wrong place to do that, but I may just get the book and read it so I’m ready for next year.
In any case, if you’re feeling up to it, it’s still not too late for you to start. You are a little behind, but you can still make it up. Hit the website and start writing! (And, yes, I wrote about this yesterday at my other blog, Diary of a Network Geek.)

Ever wanted to make your own language?
Well, if you’re like me, you have, but you may not have always known how to go about it. Don’t worry, there are lots of places on the web to help you figure out what you need to know! Of course, I’ve mentioned LangMaker.com here before, but just recently I came across the KICKS Academy Fictional Linguistics on-line course. It’s an easy “course” of material on the web that you can take at your own pace. They have plenty of references and handy worksheets to help you get through the design of your first language. They cover everything you need to know here, though, if you really enjoy yourself, you’ll probably want to branch out into some other, less traditional, areas of linguistics.
I think you’ll find it to be lots of fun, once you get started.

I can’t believe I’ve never written about this before!
At least, I couldn’t find anything about it when I searched for “font”. Anyway, this is a super cool little toy, even though it’s Java based, that lets you create your very own random and unique TrueType font. It’s some kind of art experiement or something, but, as far as I’m concerned, the Alphabet Synthesis Machine is just plain cool and fun. Of course, you can loose hours without realizing it playing with this sucker.
So, it’s a perfect way to waste time on a Friday afternoon!

How to Be a Villain: Evil Laughs, Secret Lairs, Master Plans, and More!!!
Yes, this is a real book. No, it is not serious. However, if you’re designing a villain, it’s not a bad place to start. No, seriously! Here in one book are the collected cliches of bad guys. Everything from talking when you should be shooting to the “Rube Goldberg” killing machine. You name the tragic mistake that any and all James Bond villains have made and it’s in this book somewhere. So, in a humorous way, it’s a guidebook for what NOT to do when creating your literary villain. In fact, part of the book is a warning to up-and-coming super villains on what to watch out for in heroes and the big mistakes that the “average” villain makes that costs them their victory.

There are many ways to test one’s constructed language.
There’s the infamous Babel Text, as suggested by Jeffery Henning. There are other religious texts that might be used, like the Lord’s Prayer or the Sermon on the Mount. There’s translating a “folk tale”. I’ve even seen the suggestion put forward to translate dinner menus, street signs, and adverstisments. I, myself, have suggested that, perhaps, creating a phrasebook might be the thing. All of these methods should highlight any flaw or under-developed section of your conlang. When translating, we find holes and errors and things we simply haven’t thought through yet. But, another “test” occurred to me yesterday…
I was talking to my dog in German, telling her “Du bist ein gutes Hund! Du bist ein hübsch Hund!” and watched her get all happy and wiggly. Then, it hit me. “Can you talk to your dog in your conlang?” Of course, it works for any pet, but you get the idea. So, from now on, if I work on a constructed language, I must be able to talk to my dog in it, or it’s just not good enough.
Harumph!

Ever wonder what happened to Charlie?
You know, after the whole Chocolate Factory incident? Well, wonder no more! Behold, through the wonders of web-based Wonkavision, Chocalypse Now! A web-comic based on a mashup of the aftermath of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory with Apocalypse Now. Surreal and chocolatey at the same time. What more can you ask for on a Friday?

Go ahead, no one’s looking, click the link!