Fantasist's Scroll

If you have dogs, you have got to see this!
You may have seen what you think of as fancy dog cookies in PetSmart. You know, the ones that are shaped like bones, but have frosting on them. But, I am here to tell you these are low rent compared to what the nice people at Pink Poodle Gourmet and Design have. I mean, go look at these things and you’ll see. They look almost too good to give to your dog. (Sorry, Hilda.) They’re better looking, and tasting, than a lot of cookies made for people. And, yes, before you get all wierded out by the fact that I ate dog cookies, they are made from all human-edible ingredients. They’re also quite tasty. At least, all the ones I’ve tried personally are, but I haven’t risked any liver flavored ones yet. They do sell from the website, but, you might want to find a local supplier so you don’t have to deal with shipping. (You can sniff them out at their webpage.)

Okay, okay, you caught me. This is actually a shameless plug for the darling woman that I’ve been seeing. This amazing lady has run her own business for more than two years and paid all her bills with it. Obviously, she works very, very hard at her business and her product really is amazing. I mean, I understand the rudiments of making a cookie, dog cookies even, but what she does… Well, it’s the difference between me building with Lincoln Logs and her building 30 storey sky scrapers. Really, I cannot urge you enough to go check out her work: Pink Poodle Gourmet and Design And, no, this is not a bribe to get more pie. Though, it’d be well worth it. Her pie is delicious!

Look, kids, it’s been a brutal week for your Uncle Jim, so we need us some fun.
I won’t go into the gorey details, but it seems like anything that didn’t go wrong in my life this week either went wrong in someone else’s life I know or is about to go wrong, so it’s just been a long, damn week. But, today is Friday. The weekend is almost here and you can start your fun early with some of these links.
I dipped into my collection of weird links, and boy have got some doosies, to bring you a little Friday Fun.
First, there’s an old favorite, Spamusement. This guy draws very funny cartoons based on spam that we’ve all gotten one time or another. It’s silly, goofy and always makes me chuckle.
Then, there’s this wild casemod by, well, by someone in Japan, I guess since the entire page is in Japanese. It’s a PC sphere and looks cool. I think there’s instructions for making it, or buying it, somewhere on this page. Good luck figuring out which and where!
Next, we have something to make the sinners repent: The Bible Prophecy Page! Yes, now you, too, can bring the rantings of Bible Prophecy fringe groups to the conveniece of your own home via the Internet. What will they think of next!?!
And, for those of you who are homeless wanderers, or just on vactaion and away from you computers, here’s the Cyber Cafe Search Engine. It’ll help you find your next Internet fix away from home. Of course, if you’re looking for a place to check e-mail because you don’t have a computer then you’ll have to find that first spot on your own…

Well, whatever, these were just four semi-random links I grabbed out of my mess o’ weird sites. What the heck, kids, it’s Friday and Uncle Jim says “Click the links!”

Better questions.
That’s the answer I give to people who ask why I know things they don’t. I ask better questions than they do. In fact, I think people often find it frustrating that I ask some of the questions I do. Things like, “So, if it doesn’t work, why do you keep doing it?”, or “Yeah, but why have you always done it that way?”. But, there’s always someone who asks better questions than I do. Take for instance the folks at the World Question Center. Now, if you really want to get your mind all bent out of shape, go read some of these questions. Then, think about what they mean. Really. Think about it.
(And, yes, this first appeared on my other blog. It’s Friday and I’m not even in town, so cut me some slack!)

Then go have a drink. It is, after all, Friday!
(And, yes, this originally appeared on my other blog.)

No, for a change, that’s not a metaphor.
According to The Scotsman.com, appropriately, someone is working on a “warp” drive. A physicist at the Applied Sciences University in Salzgitter, Germany, and a former chief of aerodynamics at the European Space Agency, Professor Jochem Hauser, who’s one of the scientists putting forth the idea, warned that they’re in the very early stages of this project, but indicated that an propulsion system based on ideas first developed by the late scientist Burkhard Heim in the 1950s is possible. The drive would work by creating an intense magnetic field that, in theory, would produce a gravitational field and result in thrust for a spacecraft.
That is the catch, though. It’s all theory. Now, there is a somewhat mysterious “Z Machine” that was created by the US Department of Energy that could generate the kind of magnetic fields required to drive the engine, so it is possible that some very interesting tests might be run in the near future. Apparently, NASA and the US Airforce took notice of this work after Prof Hauser and an Austrian colleague, Walter Droscher, wrote a paper called “Guidelines for a space propulsion device based on Heim’s quantum theory”.
Now, all they need to do is get a Scot on their maintenance crew and they’ll be all set.

The top eleven Geek Pickup lines, fourth edition, as stolen from BBSpot, for your Friday afternoon funny:

Geek Pick-Up Lines: Part 4
11. I have so much love to give you’ll have to pipe it through more.
10. Did you make a Google Bomb? Whatever I search for, it’s you I find.
9. Do you work for a TelCom? Because I bet you’d be good at pulling cable.
8. I was hoping you wouldn’t block my pop-up.
7. Would you like to play Scrabble with me? I am tired of playing with myself.
6. You compute me.
5. Girl, I wish I was your differential, because then I’d be touching all your curves.
4. But enough about me, let’s talk about mu.
3. Be my queen and mate me with your knight moves.
2. You’ve stolen the ASCII to my heart.
1. You must’ve been made by Intel to be that hot!

And, just as a side note, if you’re in Houston, female, over the age of twenty-one and any of these would work on you, drop me a line! 😉

I know, I was a little late with this today, but I’ve been busy. With a girl. Yeah, I know, who would have thought, right? Not having the same kind of luck? Then, my geeky readers, I’ve got just the thing for you: The top eleven Geek Pickup lines, third edition, as stolen from BBSpot, for your Friday afternoon funny:

Geek Pick-Up Lines: Part 3
11. I’m attracted to you so much that scientists will begin to doubt the Theory of Relativity.
10. What’s a nice girl like you doing in a chatroom like this?
9. Resistance is futile.
8. No matter how I sort things, you’ll always be first.
7. No, that’s not a Logitech MX-100 in my pants, but thanks for noticing.
6. I think you could be an integral part of my project life cycle.
5. I’d switch to emacs for you.
4. You put the SPARC in my workstation.
3. If you have an empty slot, I have the card to fill it.
2. We’re like SLI. We’re great alone, but we’d be so much better together.
1. You got me stuck on Caps Lock, if you know what I mean.

Hey, they just keep on getting better, don’t they? Well, there are more coming, but, I like doling them out over time. You know, to build the anticipation!
Happy Friday!

Well, I think the title says it all.
This isn’t quite safe for work, or if your parents are watching, but it is funny. Yes, I can remember a time when this would have been everything I was looking for in chicks. Oh, yeah, everything.
Hey, it’s Friday, you’re presumably an adult with a sense of humor, so, go check out Geek Fantasies, and remember when…

Today is William Gibson’s Birthday!

For those of you who have been hiding under a rock, or have been freshly cloned, William Gibson is the primary progenitor of the cyberpunk movement. He’s generally credited with coining the term “cyberspace” and popularizing a somewhat more realistic, if somewhat bleak, view of the future.
He also ran away to Canada in 1968 to avoid the draft. Which is the only bad thing I can say about him. I otherwise admire his work and thought processes. Certainly his literature is beyond compare. I admire his work very much and occasionally will reread some of his short stories, just to capture the feel of his prose.

Anyway, celebrate his birthday with a little science-fiction in thanks for what he’s done for the genre.