Fantasist's Scroll

Well, it’s my birthday, too!
No, seriously, it’s my birthday. And, look, I could copy and paste everything I wrote in my other blog about this blessed event, but I’m too lazy, so I’ll just link to it.

I missed posting on Friday.
Normally, I have a Friday Fun Link post of some kind, no matter what is going on, but I missed it this Friday. But, I had a few too many things on my mind, so I missed it this time around. You have my deepest apologies. I promise there’ll be something there this Friday.

Why do people search for some of this stuff?
Okay, I get why people would be looking for “lucy liu porn” or “mariska hargitay porn”, but what makes them think they’re going to find it here? Last month, my number one hit search term was “lucy liu porn”. Doesn’t anyone search for “fantasy cartography” and find my site anymore? Or “conlang generator”? Always back to the porn. Sadly, it does increase hits and my Googlerank. Ah, well, there’s no accounting for it, I guess. As P.T. Barnum once said, “No one ever got rich overestimating the American people.”

"Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand."

Did I mention that I’ve turned comments back on?
I probably haven’t but since my last upgrade to WordPress v1.5, I’ve got a new comment moderation system that kills 99.999% of all spam. So, I went and re-enabled comments. Not that I post that much that folks would comment on here, but still, it’s the thought. All of which means that both of you reading this blog can comment now. 🙂

"The fact that no one understands you doesn't make you an artist."

No wonder I never got paid for this!
Apparently, Rob Kuntz never did finish the planned modules that I did maps for in Campaign Cartographer. And, of course, I did them knowing I would not get paid until they were published. So, since they were never published, I was never paid. Now, apparently, he’s selling his entire stash of gaming stuff, including the Barbarous Coast Maps.
Even though I have them posted here on my site, Rob retains all rights to them. Insist on getting them signed, if you can manage it, since, in my opinion, that’s the only way the printed maps are really worth anything.
Gaming is a tough business and I’m sorry that it looks like Rob has hit a money crunch and needs to sell his stuff. Go check it out and buy something, if you can. He’s a great guy and I’m sorry to see him having to do this.
Good luck, Rob.

Unfortunately, that leaves little time to be creative.
Still, it’s that job that pays for this website, so I guess it’s not all bad! I have been writing a bit, or at least trying to write. At the suggestion of my therapist, who I can’t see right now thanks to insurance and job change issues, I was trying to write a story that did NOT include fantastic or magical or science-fictional elements. Honestly, it was going okay, but I just didn’t have much invested in the story, so I haven’t done well writing on it. Well, that and my total lack of time for writing and discipline. I still suffer from the illusion that my writing should be “inspired” and just flow naturally onto the page. Sadly, that’s just not how it is for most writers, especially the professionals.
Oh, but I do have an OpenOffice Story Templatethat you can download! (Just click the link and you’ll get it.) It might be a little buggy, but it should get you started. If you have problems, let me know and, if I have time, I’ll try to get them worked out.

I LOVE Friday the Thirteenth!
Why? Well, mainly because I’m perverse and everyone else seems to distrust it. Also, over the years, I’ve complained about my bad luck so often that I used to say the only time I had good luck was when everyone else had bad luck. So, Friday the Thirteenth, became one of my “lucky” days. Not sure how this one will turn out, but I’m hoping for the best!
Oh, and here’s a link to why everyone else is afraid of Friday the Thirteenth.

Hey, why not click that link. After all, what else could go wrong today?

I need strange, metaphorical symbols.
I’ve been thinking about surreal imagery lately. Things like the anthropomorphic caterpillar from Disney’s version of “Alice in Wonderland” and the dancing mushrooms from “Fantasia” keep popping into my head as wonderful symbols of some strange story that’s hiding just below the surface of the “real” story. And, too, William S. Burrough’s work with the exterminator/giant cockroach theme has been a frightening inspiration as well. Not to mention the “bug” in Kafka’s “The Metamorphosis”. So, I’ve been thinking about doing something similar. Taking a list of semi-random symbols and imagery and mashing it into a story. And, I’m going for something very Dali-eseque, but in a literary sense. Of course, the challenge is to get the symbols to use. The stranger, the better, I think.
And, now, gentle readers, here is my plea: Give me your wildest ideas in the comments. Suggest the strangest, most disturbing, funniest, most unusual symbolic references you can think of. As long as we keep it “family friendly”, anything goes. But, you have to give me their “true” meaning, as well. For example, “A giant, talking, anthropomorphic caterpillar => The main character’s SuperEgo”. (Actually, that may just be where I start…) So, there we are.
I’m open to suggestions!